Results tagged “amusement”

I managed to stab myself in the face with my own car door. Not necessarily an easy task to be sure. I was getting my laptop bag from the back seat of my car and as I bent down, somehow my face came into contact with that pointy bit of the car door at the top. That was a good time.

Because I'm far too cheap to go next door and buy coffee when I'm at the office, I make my own. I boil the water in the microwave and then walk slowly and surely back to my desk to finish up. I was doing fine until I sat down and then sort of did a spaz thing with my arm and burned my hand on the water that came out of the jug. That was a good time.

So I'm now wondering what else today holds for me. I can hardly wait. Clumsy Spencer is clumsy.

About 18 months or so ago, ish, Hazel talked me into growing a beard. Not convinced I wouldn't look like a total wanker, I hesitantly agreed. And you know what, I sort of liked it after a while.

Then a teeny bit of beard boredom set in and I began to think Grizzy Adams. Something a little more cast away on a desert island kind of thing. You know, like you do. Back in January I pondered...

I've had a beard for about, hmm, 10 months now. I like it. But you know what I'd really like? I'd like one of those 2 foot beards, all cast away on a desert island kind of thing. That would be cool.

Yeah, so er, obviously that didn't happen.

But I haven't used those beard clipper thingies now for about two weeks and it's starting to look a little scruffy, a little survivor, a little trapped in a log cabin.

So I'm at one of those beard crossroads. Trim or go for the gold? The time could be right to give it a whirl...

When the Zombies come, and believe me they're coming, I know where I'm heading first.

Then we'll be barricading ourselves in the local Costco. So if you're in Phoenix and a survivor, remember the secret knock on the Costco door and I'll let you in.

You're welcome.

Dear Zombies, I was totally kidding about the whole Costco thing. Really. We're probably in that field up in a tree in the total opposite direction. Honest.

Sometimes a quote is all you really need.

Chimpanzees are just like you and me except that they are much stronger, much meaner, more violent, and much more terrifying. Also they have fangs and absolutely no limits.

So there you go. You're welcome.

My local gas station reminds me that I'm pumping guaranteed gasoline.

Which is nice, because running the risk of accidentally pumping peach tea does get annoying after a while.

I've had a beard for about, hmm, 10 months now. I like it. But you know what I'd really like? I'd like one of those 2 foot beards, all cast away on a desert island kind of thing. That would be cool. There are however two factors I'd need to take into account.

1. I'd look like a wanker.
2. My girlfriend would leave me.

So you see, a two foot beard is probably not going to happen. But I'd still really like one. And in my own mind, that's all that matters.

While sipping my coffee this morning the following tweets amused me no end.

Designer Logan Walters has put together some alternate Space Invader designs. And I absolutely love them.

I think the Borg and the Rambo Invaders are my faves.

Just why are...

...those Brits...

...those Americans...

...and the French...

Halloween was never really that big in England when I was growing up. We didn't trick or treat, didn't decorate the outside of the house, didn't wear costumes. Back then, it was always something those Americans did.

These days I'm practically one of those Americans myself and gladly take part in all the Halloween shenanigans. Like carving Pumpkins with my girlfriend's little one.

I do like Halloween.

• Rejoice for it's finally that time of year here in Arizona. It's getting cooler and quite frankly, I like that. Being able to have the windows open in the mornings seems like such a small thing, but when you haven't been able to have fresh air in the house for a while it's all rather lovely.

• Dyson Air Blades are the best hand dryers in the history of ever. And I mean ever. Hmm, exactly how sad is it that whenever I see one in a bathroom I instantly go to myself "sweet, there's a Dyson Air Blade in here"?

(Photo credit: protoflux)

• I'm far too much of a cheap git to actually buy Q magazine as it's an import over here and thus more than a few bucks. Usually that means I sit my bum down in Barnes & Noble once a month and read the whole thing in one go. But not this month as my sister brought a copy from England. So obviously it took its rightful place in the bathroom. Like all good magazines should. Should look at getting some kind of magazine rack...

• As online photo editing tools go, I do love picnick. The user interface is so simple and so well done. It always make me smile when it launches as well. The loading... messages always have their own unique style. And very festive for this time of the year:

hanging garlic...
preparing tricks...
carving pumpkins...

When I was younger I remember how excited I used to get when the fair came to town. I'd be in my Mum & Dad's car and we'd drive by the the guys setting it up and I would jump for joy. "When can we go? When can we go?". Candyfloss was eaten, fish were won, rides were ridden, arcade games were played. Good times they were.

Every year, Phoenix hosts the Arizona State Fair at the permanent fairgrounds by the Veterens Memorial Coliseum. So on Saturday afternoon we decided we'd take the little one down there to have a wander around.

It's quite a big fair, far larger than the ones I went to when I was younger. And you know what, it turns out I still love them almost as much as I did back then. Something about the smell of the food, the sound of the rides, the loud music.

Did I mention the smell of the food?

As afternoon turned to evening, the fairgrounds came alive with even more people arriving to ride the rides.

The night ended as all nights should end, eating deep fried brownie.

Alas we didn't get to see John Michael Montgomery & The Honky Tonk Tailgate Party. So disappointed. Ahem.

[Moozik: Front Line Assembly - Neologic Spasm]

My favorite comedian ever in the history of ever is Mr Eddie Izzard. I have all his standup gigs on DVD and have watched them over and over again. Never fails to make me laugh.

This week he completed a really rather impressive 43 marathons in 51 days. In honor of which, I thought I'd dig out this oldie but goodie.

Death Star Canteen

[Moozik: The Doors - Horse Latitudes]

I'm really quite partial to Google's Insights for Search. You feed it some search terms and you get a nice pretty graph of how they compare against each other. It allows you to do 'Battle Of The Bands' types of queries.

Battle Of The Bands

My fave three bands Depeche Mode, The Cure, and Nine Inch Nails. A bit of back & forth between DM & The Cure over the past few years. NIN able to poke its head up a couple of times.

Battle For Europe

England, France, Germany. The French winning by an absolute mile and spiking annually thanks to the Tour De France I would imagine. Blighty holding her own against the Germans though.

Battle Of Underwear

Knickers, bras, and pants. Look at pants beating out the competition. Way to go pants. Shame that Americans got the whole pants thing wrong and skewed the results but still amuses me nonetheless.

Battle Of Appendages

Legs, arms, tails. Those two arch rivals the arm and the leg going head to head. Tails have got to be gutted at coming last.

[Moozik: Depeche Mode - Peace]

Well, all moved and getting settled in. Photos to follow. I must say it was the least stressful move I've ever done. Ever. Something fun about moving into a new house with someone I suppose. A lot of things are still in boxes but slowly everything is making it to the correct room and unpacking things together is part of the fun. One thing is for sure, I'm going to like living here a lot more than the old house. Better area, bigger house, closer to pubs/restaurants/shops, closer to work. Exciting stuff. If only I could be as excited about my Cable.

You see, cable companies lie. Specifically Cox Cable. When I set up a service install for Monday between noon and three, I typically expect them to show up on Monday between the hours specified. Right? Common sense and all that you would think. Imagine my surprise as I pull up to the house on Sunday and learn that the tech came out at 8:30am and left a "we were here and you weren't so how much do you suck?" tag on my front door. So I call them and they can't send anyone back out until Saturday. Which means no internet access until the weekend :-( Which is a total pile of pants actually.

Well, I would be remiss if I didn't point out that there are in fact three wide open wireless networks flooding into our house. So when I say we have no internet access at home, that's not exactly true. And I wouldn't want to be known as a fibber. Now, if there was some method of connecting to one of these networks, I wouldn't have any idea how to do it. If some method existed of course. And I'm not saying that it does ;-)

[Moozik: Moby - My Weakness]

D-, See Me After School

Somebody nicked the e? Ran out of e's? They is guud spella? Who knows?

Lazy Bastards Pt II

Oh look, it's my favorite pet peeve of parking. As always dear fellow shopper, would it have killed you to wheel it 6 extra ft to put it back? Yes? Well that's because you're a lazy bastard.

Canine Lookers

My dogs love going for a ride in the car. A quick mention of going buh-bye is enough to get them running for the front door and knocking everything out of their way.

Suck It Easy

I'm not entirely sure whether this truck sticker is asking, suggesting, or telling me something. You decide.

[Moozik: Hanzel Und Gretyl - Blut! Sex! Fire!]

I don't know about you but whenever I'm buying my guns I try to make sure I get a guitar as well.

Because that's how I roll.

When you're buying your guns, what do you like to pair them with?

[Moozik: Low Line Caller - Built On Gasoline]

I think it's most amusing how much we rely on technology for things these days. Things that we were quite happy doing ourselves back in the day now become tasks that only a Blackberry, an iPhone, or a GPS unit can do. Be it calculating tips in a pub or restaurant, to finding your way from A to B, we've suddenly forgotten that we survived well enough without gadgets when we were younger.

My other half and I were out house hunting (that will be a separate post) the other day and had a real estate agent along with us. True to form, I doubted the real estate agent's encyclopedic knowledge of Phoenix. I mean, how could she possibly know the area better than the iPhone's map/directions app? Just follow us I said. Ok she says.

Yeah, that was embarrassing. After an afternoon of amusing phone calls, u-turns, and generally having to admit that we were totally lost, I've come to the conclusion that the iPhone map/directions app is a big bucket of fail and shall never be used again.

Mind you, just to balance things out, I do love the iPhone's tip calculator app. I'm totally crap at figuring out tip amounts and generally over tip. Now I know exactly how much 15% is. In pubs & restaurants we use it all the time to come up with the most annoying tip amounts we can. Seeing the bartender looking puzzled at his tip for $4.78 is totally worth it.

[Moozik: Decoder - Chase]

It's been around for 5 years, everyone and their brother has already seen it, but if you're like me, you'd forgotten all about it. Thanks then, to Kottke for reminding me that I have the sense of humor of an 11 year old. And you know what? I'm ok with that.

Here then, Star Wars lines improved by replacing a word with "pants".

My personal faves:

I find your lack of pants disturbing.
Chewie and me got into a lot of pants more heavily guarded than this.
I cannot teach him. The boy has no pants.
That blast came from the pants! That thing's operational!
Alderan is peaceful, we have no pants!
These aren't the pants you're looking for.
She must have hidden the pants in the escape pod.
This little one's not worth the effort. Come, let me get you some pants.

[Moozik: Killing Joke - The Feast Of Blaze]

Do you find that there are just some things that amused you growing up that still entertain you to this day? I know I do. One of which happens to be popping bubble wrap. I mean come on, how could you not be entertained doing that?

And thanks to the wonders of technology you don't even have to have bubble wrap these days. No, and let this be reason I need to get an iPhone #48877, the iPhone bubble wrap popping app.

Of course, part of the fun of bubble wrap popping is the tactile feedback you get when actually popping. So I'm not entirely convinced that this would be as entertaining. Still, I'd be willing to give it a try.

What things still entertain you now that you're all growed up?